Sunday, September 26, 2004

Let's c if u send it back

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw
a kid from my class was walking home from school. His
name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his
books. I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring
home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a
nerd."

I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football
game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I
shrugged my shoulders and went on.

As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward
him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his
arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses
went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten
feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible
sadness in his eyes.

My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and
as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw
a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said,
"Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives." He looked
at me and said, "Hey thanks!" There was a big smile on his face.

It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where
he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him
why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private
school before now.

I would have never hung out with a private school kid
before. We talked all the way home, and I carried some
of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I
asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my
friends. He said yes. We hung out all weekend and the
more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my
friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the
huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said,
"Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles
with this pile of books everyday!" He just laughed and
handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best
friends. When we were seniors, we began to think
about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I
was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be
friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He
was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business
on a football scholarship.

Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the
time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for
graduation.

I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and
speak. Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great. He
was one of those guys that really found himself during high
school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.
He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him.
Boy, sometimes I was jealous.

Today was one of those days. I could see that he was
nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back
and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be great!" He looked at me
with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled.
"Thanks," he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and
began. "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped
you make it through those tough years. Your parents,
your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly
your friends. I am here to tell all of you that being a
friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I
am going to tell you a story."

I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the
story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill
himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had
cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do
it later and was carrying his stuff home.

He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.

"Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from
doing the unspeakable."

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular
boy told us all about his weakest moment.

I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same
grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With
one small gesture you can change a person's life. For
better or for worse.

God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another
in some way. Look for God in others.

Monday, September 20, 2004

life of software engineer

A SW Engineers daily routine:

8:30AM: wake up
8:45AM: Tough decision ; To bath or not.
8:50AM: Have To.
9:15AM: Punch in.
9:20AM: Check Mail.
9:25AM: Check Again just in case...
9:30AM: Since It is already 9:30 wait for tea(9:45AM).
9:45AM: TEA party.
10:00AM: Check Mail.
10:05AM: Check again. can't Believe that no mail has come. Is every
body dead or what ?
10:20AM: Sudden feeling of loneliness and desperation turn around to
look for some body (Any body) to talk to.

10:30AM: Found a guy testing something. Feel real pity for his
pathetic, boring and useless existence.
10:40AM: Sudden urge to get some work done and fast. Start looking for
the file.(Can't remember it's name)
11:00AM: Boss summons in his office. Bad sign.
11:30AM: How the hell ! am I suppose to remember everything. Why
should I be responsible for everything that goes bad.
11:45AM: Try to locate a scapegoat. No body around.
12:00AM: Mood is really bad decide to postpone work till after lunch.
12:30AM: lunch
1:00PM: Lunch over.
1:10PM: Go for a smoke. Can't even smoke in this god forsaken place.
1:35PM: Back from a smoke. It was good. I even did not paid for the
cig. the other chap is so foolish.
1:50PM: Mood is good. Decide to go to cool web sites. Real sleazy thoughts.
2:30PM: Feeling real sleepy after such a mammoth mental effort.
2:45PM: Tea Time.
3:00PM: Chat and discuss with colleague on the bad state of the
company. Blame everybody for incompetence and laziness.
4:00PM: A guy from testing comes for help.(Jerk)
4:11PM: Try to look busy.
4:12PM: He is asking for a techn! ical help.(Real jerk).
4:15PM: After really making him beg for help decide to take a look.
4:50PM: No solution found. really angry on the guy for getting myself involved.
4:55PM: Suddenly boss is spotted in the neighbouring area. Try make as
much loud noise as possible with some obscure technical jargon thrown
in.
5:00PM: Boss has gone back to his den. Coast is clear.
5:05PM: Blame the problem on RnD.
5:10PM: Check mail. "Yes" a mail has finally arrived.
5:13PM: It's a silly joke and old too. But it felt good.
5:14PM: a quick dash for gate.
5:15PM: Third in punching out.
5:25PM: Reached Room.
5:26PM: TV on. No worth while program.
8:30PM: Still no worth while program. Every body is getting lazy and
irresponsible what will happen to this world GOD help us. Curse
government and RnD.
8:45PM: Food arrives. Pret! ty bad and stinking.
8:48PM: Dinner finished.
12:45AM: Today there were really good programs.
1:46AM: Decide to sleep. Tough day ahead.

Sardar--jokes

Sardar1:- Marte Waqt Aadmi Ko Kya Dena Chahiye?
Sardar2:-Birla cement
Sardar1:-Kyun?
Sardar2:- Kyunki Is Cement Mein Jaan Hain

A sardar was drawing money from ATM. The sardar behind
himin the line
said,
"Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur password. Its 4
asterisks(****).
The first sardar replies, " Ha! Ha! Haaa! U r
wrong.Its 1258."

What is the height of stupidity?
2 sardarjies sitting on a motorcycle & fighting for a
window seat.

Did you hear about the sardarji who is so rich he has
two swimming pools,
one of which is always empty?
It's for people who can't swim!

What do you call a Sardarji in a deep well?
A deep thinker..

Sardarji calls Air India. 'How long does it take to
fly to Amritsar?
'Just a sec,' says the customer service assistant.
'Thank you.' says the Sardarji and hangs up.

Once Santa Singh was riding a cycle and he suddenly
hit a girl!
So girl shouted, "Sala ghanti nahi maar sakta tha?"
And sardarji replied, "Poori cycle to maar di ab
ghanti alag se
maroon??"

Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway
station ticket counter
with two men ahead of him.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' demanded the man in front. He
was given a ticket.
'Ek Punjab Mail dena.' the second man asked and was
handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh, 'Ek Punjab female
dena!'
'What do u mean by Punjab female?' asked the clerk.
'It is for my wife' replied Banta Singh.

Aaj Tak gets news that 100 sardars are killed in a
train accident at
Amritsar station. Only one sardar left alive.
The correspondent goes to him and asks, "Sardarji
howdid it happen?"
Sardar: "Oh ji pucho mat. sab kuch sahi tha sab log
platform par khade
gaadi ki wait kar rahe they. Achanak announcement hui
ki shatabdee express
2 no platform par aa rahi hai. Jaise hi sab ne suna ki
gaddi PLATFORM PAR
aa rahi
hai, sab log apni jaan bachane ke liye patri par kood
gaye. Aur tabhi gaddi
patri par aa gayi."
Aaj tak: "Thank god. Aap ne samajhdari dikhayee. Aap
patri par nahin
koode."
Sardar: "oe nahin ji main to suicide karne ke
liyepatri par hi leta tha,
Jaise hi announcement hui main to platform par chad
gaya."

Hats off to all Indian men who think like this GUY: read this really good.

> This letter was written in response to an article in
> the NY times: (with
> no
> harm meant to anyone in particular)
>
> Dear Editor:
>
> I'm sorry but I would like to challenge some of your
> Indian male
> readers. I
> am a White female who is engaged to an Indian male,
> good-looking,
> educated
> and loving. I just don't understand a lot of Indian
> female's attitudes
> about
> our relationship.
>
> My man decided he wanted me because the pickings
> amongst Indian women
> were
> slim to none. As he said they were either too fat,
> too loud, too mean,
> too
> argumentative, too needy, too materialistic or
> carrying too much excess
> baggage. Before I became engaged, whenever I went
> out I was constantly
> approached by Indian men, willing to wine and dine
> me and give me the
> world.
> If Indian women are so up in arms about us being
> with their men, why
> don't
> they look at themselves and make some changes. I am
> tired of the dirty
> looks
> I get and snide remarks when we're out in public. I
> would like to hear
> from
> some Indian men about why we white women are so
> appealing and coveted by
> them. Bryant Gumbel just left his wife of 26 years
> for one of us.
> Charles
> Barkley, Scottie Pippen, the model Tyson Beckford,
> Montell Williams,
> Quincy
> Jones, James Earl Jones, Harry Belafonte, Sydney
> Poitier, Kofi Anan,
> Cuba
> Gooding Jr., Don Cornelius, Berry Gordy, Billy
> Blanks, Larry Fishburne,
> Wesley Snipes...I could go on and on. But, right
> now, I'm a little angry
> and
> that is why I wrote this so hurriedly. Don't be mad
> with us White women
> because so many of your men want us. Get your acts
> together and learn
> from
> us and we may lead you to treat your men better. If
> I'm wrong, Indian
> men,
> let me know.
>
> Disgusted White Girl, Somewhere in VA.
>
>
>
> The Response:
>
> Dear Editor:
> I would like to respond to the letter written by A
> Disgusted White Girl.
> Let
> me start by saying that I am a 28-year old Indian
> man. I graduated from
> one
> of the most prestigious universities in Atlanta,
> Georgia with a Bachelor
> of
> Arts Degree in Business Management. I have a good
> job at a major
> corporation
> and have recently purchased a house. So, I consider
> myself to be among
> the
> ranks of successful Non-White men.
>
> I will not use my precious time to slander white
> people. I just want to
> set
> the record straight of why Indian men date white
> women.
>
> Back in the day, one of the biggest reasons why
> Indian men dated white
> women
> was because they were considered easy. The Indian
> girls in my
> neighborhood
> were raised traditionally. They were very strict
> about when they lost
> their
> virginity and who they lost it to. Because of our
> impatience to wait,
> brothers would look for someone who would give it up
> easy without too
> much
> hassle. So, they turned to the white girls.
>
> Nowadays, in my opinion, a lot of Indian males date
> white women because
> they
> are docile and easy to control. A lot of Indian men,
> because of
> insecurities, fears, and overall weaknesses, have
> become intimidated by
> the
> strength of our Indian women. We are afraid that our
> woman will be more
> successful than us, make more money than us, drive
> nicer cars and own
> bigger
> houses. Because of this fear, many Indian men look
> for a more docile
> woman.
> Someone we can control. I have talked to numerous
> Indian men and they
> continuously comment on how easy it is to control
> and walk over their
> white
> women.
>
> I just want to set the record straight. I want A
> Disgusted White Girl to
> know that not all successful Indian men date white
> women. Non-Whites
> like
> Ahmad Rashad, Denzel Washington, Michael Jordan,
> Morris Chestn! ut, Will
> Smith, Blair Underwood, Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds,
> Samuel L. Jackson,
> and
> Chris Rock all married strong Non-White women. And,
> to flip the script,
> there are numerous white men, in and out of the spot
> light, who openly
> or
> secretly desire Non-White women over white women.
> Ted Danson, Robert
> DeNiro,
> and David Bowie to name a few. I just don't want a
> disgusted white girl
> to
> be misinformed.
>
> Stop thinking that because you are white that you
> are some type of
> goddess.
> Remember, when Non-White Egyptian Queens like
> Hatsepshut and Nitorcris
> were
> ruling Dynasties and armies of men in Egypt, you
> were over in the caves
> of
> Europe eating raw meat and beating each other over
> the head with clubs.
> Read
> your history! It was the Non-White woman that taught
> you how to cook and
> season your food. It was the Non-White woman that
> taught you how to
> raise
> your children. It was Non-White women who were
> breastfeeding and raising
> your babies during slavery. It is the Non-White
> woman that had to endure
> watching their fathers, husbands, and children
> beaten, killed, and
> thrown in
> jail. Indian women were born with two strikes
> against them: being
> Non-White
> and being a woman. And, through all this, Still They
> Rise!
>
> It is because of the Indian women's strength,
> elegance, power, love and
> beauty that I could never date anyone except my
> Indian Queen. It is not
> just
> the outer beauty that captivates and draws me to
> them. It is not the
> fact
> that they come in all shapes, sizes, colours and
> shades that I love
> them.
> Their inner beauty is what I find most appealing
> about Indian women.
> Their
> strong spirit, loving and nurturing souls, their
> integrity, their
> ability to
> overcome great obstacles, their willingness to stand
> for what they
> believe
> in, and their determination to succeed and reach
> their highest potential
> while enduring great pain and suffering is why I
> have fallen in love
> with
> Indian women. I honestly believe that your anger is
> geared more toward
> jealousy and envy than snotty looks. If this were
> not so, then why do
> you
> continuously go to tanning salons to darken your
> skin? If you are so
> proud
> to be white, then why don't you just be happy with
> your pale skin? Why
> do
> you continue to inject your lips, hips, and breasts
> with unnatural and
> dangerous substances so you can look fuller and more
> voluptuous? I think
> that your anger is really a result of you wanting to
> have what the
> Non-White
> woman has.
>
> BOTTOM LINE: If I were looking for a docile woman,
> someone I can walk
> over
> and control, I would give you a call. But,
> unfortunately, I am looking
> for a
> Virtuous Woman. Someone that can be a good wife and
> mother to my
> children.
> Someone who can be my best friend and understands my
> struggles. I am
> looking
> for a soul mate and; unfortunately, you do not and
> CANNOT fit the bill.
>
> No offense taken, none given.
>
> Signed,
>
> Indian Royalty

c constructs

COMPUTER PROGRAMMING SONG

# Local variable

Mein pal do pal ka shayar hoon,
pal do pal meri kahani hai
pal do pal meri hasti hai..

# Global variable

Main har ik pal ka shayar hoon
har ik pal meri kahani hai
har ik pal meri hasti hai

# Null pointers

Mera jeevan kora kagaz
kora hi reh gaya.

# Dangling pointers

Maut bhi aati nahi
jaan bhi jati nahin.

# Goto

Ajeeb dastan hai yeh
Kahan shuru kahan khatam
Ye manzilen hain kaun si
Na woh samajh sake na hum

# Two Recursive functions calling each other

Mujhe kuchh kehna hein
mujhe bhi kuchh kehna hein
Pehle tum, pehle tum.

# The debugger

Jab koi baat bigad jaye
Jab koi mushkil pad jaye
Tum dena saath mera hamnawaz.


# From VC++ to VB

Yeh haseen vaadiyan
Yeh khula asmaan
Aa gaye hum kahan.



# Untrackable bug

Aye ajnabi, tu bhi kabhi, awaaz de kahin se.

# Unexpected bug (esp during presentation to client)

Ye kya hua, Kaise hua, Kab hua, Kyon hua.

# And then to the client

Jab hua, Tab hua, O chhodo, ye na socho.

# Load Balancing

Saathi haath badhana
ek akela thak jayega
mil kar bojh uthana

# Modem ( modem talk on a busy connection)
suno - kaho,kaha - suna,kuch huwa kya?
abhee to nahin..

# Windows getting open sourced

Parde mein rahne do parda na uthao
parda jo uth gaya to bhed khul jayeha
allah meri tauba, allah meri tauba


AND SOME FILMS

# ESC : NO DO GYARA
# F1 : GUIDE
# UNDO : AA AB LAUT CHALE
# SYSTEM WHOSE OS IS DOS : BUDHA MIL GAYA
# SOFTWARE & HARDWARE : EK DUJE KE LIYE
# ALT+CNTR+DEL : AAKHARI RASTA
# HARD DISK & FLOPPY : GHARWALI BAHERWALI
# RAM : KORA KAGAZ
# C++ & C : BADEMIYA CHOTEMIYA

--------------------------------------------------------

proud to be an indian

FACTS TO MAKE EVERY Indian PROUD
>
>Q. Who is the co-founder of Sun Microsystems?A. Vinod Khosla
>Q. Who is the creator of Pentium chip (needs no introduction as 90%
of the today's computers run on it)?
>A. Vinod Dahm
>Q. Who is the third richest man on the world?
>
>A. According to the latest report on Fortune Magazine, it is Aziz
Premji, who is the CEO of Wipro Industries. The Sultan of Brunei is
at 6th position now.
>
>
>
>Q. Who is the founder and creator of Hotmail (Hotmail is world's No.1
web based email program)?
>
>A. Sabeer Bhatia
>
>
>
>Q. Who is the president of AT & T-Bell Labs (AT & T-Bell Labs is the
creator of program languages such as C, C++, Unix to name a few)?
>
>A. Arun Netravalli
>
>
>
>Q. Who is the GM of Hewlett Packard?
>
>A. Rajiv Gupta
>
>
>
>Q. Who is the new MTD (Microsoft Testing Director) of Windows 2000,
responsible to iron out all initial problems?
>
>A. Sanjay Tejwrika
>
>
>
>Q. Who are the Chief Executives of CitiBank, Mckensey & Stanchart?
>
>A. Victor Menezes, Rajat Gupta, and Rana Talwar.
>
>
>
>Q. We Indians are the wealthiest among all ethnic groups in America,
even faring better than the whites and the natives.
>
>
>
>There are 3.22 millions of Indians in USA (1.5% of population). YET,
>
>38% of doctors in USA are Indians.
>
>12% scientists in USA are Indians.
>
>36% of NASA scientists are Indians.
>
>34% of Microsoft employees are Indians.
>
>28% of IBM employees are Indians.
>
>17% of INTEL scientists are Indians.
>
>13% of XEROX employees are Indians.
>
>
>
>
>
>Some of the following facts may be known to you. These facts were
recently published in a German magazine, which deals with WORLD
HISTORY FACTS ABOUT INDIA.
>
>
>
>1. India never invaded any country in her last 1000 years of history.
>
>
>
>2. India invented the Number system. Zero was invented by Aryabhatta.
>
>
>
>
>
>3. The world's first University was established in Takshila in
700BC. More than 10,500 students from all over the world studied more
than 60 subjects... The University of Nalanda built in the 4th century
BC was one of the greatest achievements of ancient India in the field
of education.
>
>
>
>4. According to the Forbes magazine, Sanskrit is the most
suitable language for computer software.
>
>
>
>5. Ayurveda is the earliest school of medicine known to humans.
>
>
>
>6. Although western media portray modern images of India as
poverty striken and underdeveloped through political corruption,
India was once the richest empire on earth.
>
>
>
>7. The art of navigation was born in the river Sindh 5000 years
ago. The very word "Navigation" is derived from the Sanskrit word
NAVGATIH.
>
>
>
>8. The value of pi was first calculated by Budhayana, and he
explained the concept of what is now known as the Pythagorean Theorem.
British scholars have last year (1999) officially published that
Budhayan's works dates to the 6th Century which is long before the
European mathematicians.
>
>
>
>9. Algebra, trigonometry and calculus came from India. Quadratic
equations were by Sridharacharya in the 11th Century; the largest
numbers the Greeks and the Romans used were 106 whereas Indians used
numbers as big as 1053.
>
>
>
>10. According to the Gemmological Institute of America, up until
1896, India was the only source of diamonds to the world.
>
>
>
> 11. USA based IEEE has proved what has been a century-old suspicion amongst academics that the pioneer of wireless communication was Professor Jagdeesh Bose and not Marconi.
>
>
>
>12. The earliest reservoir and dam for irrigation was built in Saurashtra.
>
>13. Chess was invented in India.
>
>
>
>14. Sushruta is the father of surgery. 2600 years ago he and health
scientists of his time conducted surgeries like cesareans, cataract,
fractures and urinary stones. Usage of anaesthesia was well known in
ancient India.
>
>
>
> 15. When many cultures in the world were only nomadic forest dwellers over 5000 years ago, Indians established Harappan culture in Sindhu Valley (Indus Valley Civilisation).
>
>
>
>16. The place value system, the decimal system was developed in India
in 100 BC.
>
>
>
>Quotes about India.
>
>
>
>We owe a lot to the Indians, who taught us how to count, without
which no worthwhile scientific discovery could have been made.
>
>Albert Einstein.
>
>
>
>India is the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human
speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend and the great
grand mother of tradition.

Mark Twain.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>If there is one place on the face of earth where all dreams of living
men have found a home from the very earliest days when man began the
dream of existence, it is India.
>
>French scholar Romain Rolland.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>India conquered and dominated China culturally for 20 centuries
without ever having to send a single soldier across her border.
>
>Hu Shih
>
>(former Chinese ambassador to USA)
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>ALL OF THE ABOVE IS JUST THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG, THE LIST COULD BE ENDLESS.
>
>BUT, if we don't see even a glimpse of that great India in the India
that we see today, it clearly means that we are not working up to our
potential; and that if we do, we could once again be an evershining
and inspiring country setting a bright path for rest of the world to
follow.
>
>I hope you enjoyed it and work towards the welfare of INDIA.
>
>
>
>
>
>Say proudly, I AM AN INDIAN.

Sunday, September 19, 2004

5 corporate lessons you need to learn

Corporate Lesson 1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up he
shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over
which one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife gives up,
quickly wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs.

When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor.
Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that
towel that you have on."

After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked
in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her 800 dollars and
leaves.

Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up
in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets back to the bathroom,
her husband asks from the shower,

"Who was that?" "It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.
"Great!" the husband says, "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes
me?"

Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to
credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a
position to prevent avoidable exposure.

Corporate Lesson 2

A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road. He
stopped and offered her a lift which she accepted. She got in and
crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and reveal a lovely leg. The priest
had a look and nearly had an accident.

After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The
nun ooked at him and immediately said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"

The priest was flustered and apologized profusely. He forced himself
to remove his hand. Changing gear, he let his hand slide up her leg
again. The nun once again
said, "Father, sister but the flesh is weak."

Arriving at the convent, the nun got out gave him a meaningful glance
and went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed
to retrieve a bible and looked up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and
seek, further up, you will find glory."

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you
might miss a great opportunity.

Corporate Lesson 3

A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to lunch
when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out
in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so
I'll give each of you just one. "

"Me first! Me first!" says the admin. clerk. "I want to be in the
Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone.

"Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii,
relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of pina
coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone.

"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I
want those two back in the office after lunch."

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

Corporate Lesson 4

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the
crow and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day
long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground
below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden a fox appeared, jumped on the
rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be
sitting very high up.

Corporate Lesson 5

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, but I haven't got the
energy."

"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.
"They're packed with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found
that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch
of that tree.
The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second
branch.

Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top
of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the
turkey out of
the tree.

Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't
keep you there!

Well, my terminal's locked up, and I ain't got any Mail,
And I can't recall the last time that my program didn't fail;
I've got stacks in my structs, I've got arrays in my queues,
I've got the : Segmentation violation -- Core dumped blues.

If at first you dont succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.

Take time to laugh

Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.

Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born.

Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladies first.

Waiter : I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer : Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu card.

Customer : Waiter, do you serve crabs?
Waiter : Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.

Teacher : Peter, why are you late for school again?
Peter : Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and
the game went into extra time.

Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Delhi
in two days time?
Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Mumbai.

Girl : Do you love me?
Boy : Yes Dear.
Girl : Would you die for me?
Boy : No, mine is undying love.

1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!
2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor.
1st thief : Hurry! this is no time for superstitions.

Girlsssssssssssss

The problems with GIRLS

If u TREAT her nicely, she says u are IN LOVE with her;
If u Don't, she says u are PROUD.
If u DRESS Nicely, she says u are trying to LURE her;
If u Don't, she says u are from MADURAI.
If u ARGUE with her, she says u are STUBBORN;
If u keep QUIET,! she says u have no BRAINS.
If u are SMARTER than her, she'll lose FACE;
If she's Smarter than u, she is GREAT.
If u don't Love her, she tries to POSSESS u;
If u Love her, she will try to LEAVE u.(very true huh?)
If u tell her your PROBLEM, she says u are TROUBLESOME;
If u don't, she says that u don't TRUST her.
If u SCOLD her, u are like a CHACHA to her;
If she SCOLDS u,! it is because she CARES for u.
If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot be TRUSTED;
If she BREAKS hers, she is FORCED to do so.
If u do WELL in your exams, she says it's LUCK;
If she does WELL, it's BRAINS.
If u HURT her, u are CRUEL;
If she HURTS u, u are too SENSITIVE!! & sooo hard to please!!!!!
If u send this to girls, they will swear that this is absurd.......
But if u don't, they say u are afraid to send it to them....
The moral of the story is......

SEND THIS TO GIRLS OUT THERE ANYWAY...
Send it to boys also, aware them of the truth!!!!!!

The basic diffrence b/w a man & a woman

How a BOY withdraws cash from ATM
1. Park the car
2. Go to ATM Machine
3. Insert card
4. Enter PIN
5. Take money out
6. Take ATM Card out
7. Drive away...

How a GIRL withdraws cash from ATM
1. Park the car
2. Check makeup
3. Turn off engine
4. Check makeup
5. Go to ATM
6. Hunt for ATM card in the purse
7. Insert card
8. Hit Cancel
9. Hunt in purse for chit with PIN written on it
10. Insert card
11. Enter PIN
12. Take cash
13. Go to car
14. Check makeup
15. Start car
16. Stop car
17. Run back to ATM
18. Take ATM card
19. Back to car
20. Check makeup
21. Start car
22. Check makeup
23. Drive for 1/2 mile
24. Release handbrake
25. Drive on...

How to Choose A Girl in Arra nged Marriage !

Some tips for Arranged marriage

Arranged marriage

There are times in a person's life when he needs to take crucial
decisions on his own. Marriage is one of them. Believe me, the decision
on whom to marry is the most important decision a person will make in
his life. After marriage, your wife is the most important person in your
life. She can make or break your life. The mere thought of this is very
frightening.

Some of the questions that crop up are -

a.. What sort of a girl do I marry?
b.. Will she adjust in my family?
c.. How can I decide on a girl by just meeting her for a few times? d..
When should I get married? e.. This is my life. So, I should choose the
girl I marry, but then what if I make a mistake? .. so on and so forth.

I will try to address these & many more questions in the following
sections.

The Ten Rules of Arranged marriage

Rule 1 - Magic no. 28

In an ideal scenario, a girl goes to college at the age of 18. By the
time she graduates, goes for her post graduation and/ or works for 1-2
years, she will be about 23- 24. This means that she has spent about 5
years away from her home. In the 5 years period, she would meet many
smart guys at college or during her first few years on job. So, in all
probability it would be difficult to find a good girl older than 24 yrs.
Secondly, in Indian families there is lot of pressure on the girl's to
get married by the time they become 24-25.

Statistics says that there is a generation gap after every 5 years. So,
in such scenario, one would prefer to marry a girl who is about 3-4
years younger to you. Thus, working backwards, an ideal age for a guy to
get married is by 28. Earlier the marriage, the better it is.

Well, as we all know, in the current market scenario, there will never
be stability in our career. So, I believe there is no such thing as, "I
will marry when I settle down".

Rule 2 -- Subset of marriage-able girls

At times you hear statements like, "I am not getting the right match, I
will look after 3 months, I will find a better match then". Well the
truth is otherwise. The subset of unmarried girl looking for a match is
fixed. From this subset, there would be girls who would get married &
there would be new girls added who would be looking for a match. The net
result is that at any given time, the variety & number of marriage-able
girls are fixed.

Rule 3 - Competition for girls

Like all other facets of life, there is lot of competition for good
girls. In my own case, I was rejected by girls. So, if you are looking
for a girl who is post graduate, done her Engg, is working, very
beautiful, smart, from a good family etc. etc, just think again. There
are other guys who are also looking for similar girls & probably they
are better off than you in terms of career, looks personality etc. Given
a choice every guy would like to marry Aishwarya Rai.So, set your
expectations accordingly.

Rule 4 -- Understanding girls

You would have met a lot of people during your life. As we all know, its
difficult to judge a person based on a few meetings. I am sure you would
agree with me that in case of girls it is even more difficult to
understand them in a few meetings. I know people who are still trying to
understand their wife. ;-).. Understanding your spouse is a life long
assignment. So, then how do you select a girl based on a few meeting?
This is where you need to take the help of your parents/ friends &
latest technologies like email/chat to choose your girl.

Rule 5 - Society expectation

The selection process is tough on every one who is involved in the
process. In arranged marriage, involvement of family & society is pretty
high. You can't meet a girl 3-4 times & then say no to her. It is bad
for her future. So, you should have a good short-listing criterion. Meet
only a few girls & be sure what you are looking for. It is for the
benefit of everyone involved.

Rule 6 -- Marriage between equals

Unlike love marriage, in arranged marriage you also marry into the
girl's family. In arranged marriages, family support plays a major role
in ensuring a successful marriage. This is where the compatibility of
social status, family values & caste/religion plays

a major role. Its important to note that in case there is a perfect
match between the two families, the marriage is destined to succeed.

Rule 7 - Know yourself

Unlike love marriage, in arranged marriage you first marry a person &
then fall in love. So, it's very important that you do a self-assessment
on the kind of person you would love. They say, "Opposite attract",
while they also say, "Bird of same feather flock together". So, you take
a call on what sort of person you like. Take a pen & paper; write down
the kind of attributes you are looking for in a girl. Say, she should
ideally have the looks of Sonia, the style of Monica, the voice of
Sheena, the patience of Rashmi. You will certainly not find the perfect
girl, but then you would have a good idea of what you are looking for.
The secret here is to set some minimum criteria for selection. Don't
forget rule no.3 here.

Rule 8 -- Girl's Beauty

A girl's looks attract, but then no one wants to end up marrying a dumb
blonde. It is like buying your bike. When you initially buy it, you are
crazy about the looks, but later on you love it for its reliability,
fuel economy & comfort level. Similarly, a girl's looks are important,
but then it should not be the most important criteria. Later on it life,
you will get bored of her looks. It is then that her personality &
behavior will make all the difference to your marriage. I am sure your
parents will be able to advice you a lot better on this topic.

Rule 9 -- Taking advice

As I have mentioned in the next rule, it's very important that the final
decision on whom to marry must necessarily be yours. However, don't do
the mistake of isolating yourself from the world while planning your
marriage. Discuss with your parents & very close friends on this issue.
They are your well wishers. Secondly, in such important matters its
necessary that you analyze all possibilities. Remember, I am not
suggesting that you follow others' advice, but don't forget to take
their advice.

Rule 10 -- Own decision

All said & done, it's your marriage & your life that is at stake. Once
you are married, you & your wife are the only persons who will be facing
the music. Don't marry a girl just because your parents or

friends asked you to do so. After marriage, if things don't work out &
you end up saying, "It's because of my friends or my parents that I
married you", then your marriage is destined for disaster. If the girl
is of your choice, it is you who will be responsible for whatever
happens. That's when the marriage works out perfectly. So, ensure that
you marriage the girl of your choice.

How to approach the selection process?

From the day, a person decides to get married; the selection process
takes a minimum of 3 months. The whole process needs a lot of patience &
commitment. The ideal steps to be followed are:

a.. Definition phase --

Define the minimum criteria for the kind of life partner you are looking
for in terms of education, physical appearance, social status, family
values, future career plans. Remember the Rule 3 here.

b.. Lead Generation phase --

Place ads in various newspapers, magazines, websites, through friends,
family friends, family societies & association etc. You need to exhaust
all possible means of getting biodatas at one go. Remember the Rule 2
here.

c.. Short listing phase -

Based on your selection criteria, short-list the interesting biodatas.
The general process followed for

correspondence is as follows:

1.. The initiator sends a one page profile of himself/ herself.

2.. Based on the profile, the receiver sends his/her one page profile
along with request for detailed profile, photo, horoscope.

3.. The initiator then sends the requested information along with a
request for similar information.

4.. The receiver send similar information.

5.. If the biodata is selected, it is passed over to the next phase.

A.. Casual interaction phase -

Based on shortlisting, about 7 to 10 biodatas are taken forwarded to
this phase. The next step to follow

here is to exchange email/ chat ids. The guy & the girl then interact
for 10 - 15 days to try & judge mutual compatibility through email/chat.

B.. Family interaction phase -

Based on the earlier phase, about 5 leads are taken for consideration in
this phase. During this phase, the parents get involved & check the
background information about the families to find mutual compatibility.

C.. The dating phase -

Based on the earlier phase about 3 leads are taken forward to this
phase. During this phase, the guy & the girl interact by going out alone
for 2-3 times. The guy needs to prepare a set of simple questions like
who is your favorite star, what are your hobbies? He needs to use his
judgment to analyze the girl based on her responses.

D.. The D-day phase -

Finally, the D-day comes when the guy has to select the girl he wants to
spend his life with. If the process if followed systematically, there
will be no ambiguity in deciding who should be your life partner.

Finally, my dear friends, marriage is all about compromises. In spite of
all the planning that you do, there are a lot of uncertainties in a
marriage. In fact this is the best part about marriage. Just remember
that the person you marry must be of your choice. In such case, there
would be no going back for both of you.

A few words of advice: To make your marriage a success; just believe in
the age-old virtue, "Never do anything to others that you don't like for
yourself".

Enjoy the selection process, it is fun.. :-) !!!

Programming hai waste

Imagine ur self in a Sprite Ad

Your Colleague : Hey !! Kya yahan baitha mail forward
karta rahta hai yaar !! Naye packages dekh.... Naye
language seekh. Night out Maar....Fundoo programming
kar like me....! Do something cool man !!
You: Achha ! To usse Kya hoga ..
Your Colleague : Impression !!! Appraisal !!!
Har appraisal main tu No 1!
Hike in salary !! Extra Stocks
You : Phir kya hoga...
Your Colleague: Project Leader ban jaayega..Phir Project Manager !!!
Phir Business Manager ! One day U will be a
Director of the Company man !!
You : Acchha to phir kya hoga...
Your Colleague: Abe phir tu aish karega ! Koi kaam nahin karna padega !
Araam se office aayega aur MAIL check karega.
You : To ab main kya kar raha hoon ????
"Dikhawe pe na jao, apni akal lagao.
Programming hai waste, trust only copy-paste "
Powered by ctrl C
Driven by ctrl V

Know abt UR self

Just go through this info slowly. You might discover
something interesting about yourself.

1. By Name
2. By Month
3. By Date
4. By Signing Style

1. By Name

Does your name begin with: A?

U are not particularly romantic, but you are
interested in action.
You
mean business. With you, what you see is what you
get. You have
no
patience for flirting and can't be bothered with
someone who is
trying to be coy, cute, demure, and subtly enticing.
You are an
up-front
person. You often don't get hints & you never pass
any. Brains
turn you
on. You must feel that your partner is
intellectually
stimulating;
otherwise you will find it difficult to sustain the
relationship.
You
require loving, cuddling, wining, and dining to know
that you're
being
appreciated. Your mate's physical attractiveness is
important for
you. You tend to be
very practical, & not very emotional. Your choices
are very good &
can
only lead to trouble. You are very self satisfied &
egoistic.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: B?

You give off vibes of lazy sensuality. You enjoy
being romanced,
wined,
and dined. You are very happy to receive gifts as an
statement of
the
affection of your lover. You want to be pampered and
know how to
pamper
your mate. You are private in your statement of
endearments, and
particular when it comes to love. You will hold off
until
everything meets with your approval. You can control
your appetite
& feelings. You require new sensations and
experiences. You are
willing to experiment.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: C?

You are a very social individual, and it is
important to you to
have a
relationship. You require closeness and
togetherness. You want the
object of your affection to be socially acceptable
and
good-looking. You see your
lover as a friend and companion. You are very
sensual, needing
someone to appreciate and almost worship you. When
this cannot be
achieved, you have the ability to hold out on affe!
action until
you receive this. You are an
expert at controlling your desires and doing
without.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: D?

Once you get it into your head that you want
someone, you move
full steam ahead in your suit. You do not give up
your quest
easily. You are
nurturing and caring. If someone has a problem, this
turns you on.
You are highly passionate, loyal, and intense in
your
involvement's,
sometimes possessive and jealous. You are very sharp
& talented
often with sense of humour. When people bother to
look deep inside
they cannot resist
what they see. You are stimulated by the eccentric
and unusual,
having a
free and open attitude. You get jealous of other
people and lose
your
temper.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: E?

Your greatest need is to talk. If your date is not a
good
listener, you
have trouble relating. A person must be !
intellectually
stimulating or
you are not interested sexually. You need a friend
for a lover and
a
companion. You hate disharmony and disruption, but
you do enjoy
a
good argument once in a while-it seems to stir
things up. You
flirt a lot, for the challenge
is more important. But once you give your heart
away, you are
uncompromisingly loyal. You will fall asleep with a
good book.
Sometimes, in fact, you prefer a good book to a
lover.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: F?

You are idealistic and romantic, putting your lover
on a pedestal.
You
look for the very best mate you can find. You are a
flirt, yet
once
committed, you are very loyal. You are sensuous and
privately
passionate. Publicly, you can be showy, extravagant,
and gallant.
You are a
born romantic.Dramatic love scenes are a favourite
fantasy past
time. You can be a very
generous lover.

_______________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: G?

You are fastidious, seeking perfection within
yourself and your
lover. You respond to a lover who is your
intellectual equal or
superior, and one who
can enhance your status. You are sensuous and know
how to reach
the peak
of stimulation, because you work at it meticulously.
You can be
extremely active-never tiring out. Your duties and
responsibilities take precedence
over everything else. You may have difficulty
getting emotionally
close to people.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: H?

You seek a mate who can enhance your zest for life,
fun &
everything you
seek for. You will be very generous to your lover
once you have
attained a
commitment. You are very affectionate & very strong.
Your gifts
are
actually an investment in your partner. Before the
commitment, though, you tend to be very careful with
your every
move and
equally cautious in your involvements often! , as
you believe that
you
have to look out for yourself .. You are a sensual
and patient
lover. You will hold off till everything meets your
full approval.
You are a
perfectionist, hard to satisfy and strong in your
beliefs. Not
influential, you always stand your ground. People
can always count
on you to stand by them in a crisis. You are a
dreamer with a
passion for life.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: I?

You have a great need to be loved,
appreciated...even worshiped.
You enjoy luxury, sensuality, and pleasures of the
flesh. You like
necking spend hours just touching feeling &
exploring. You look
for lovers who know what
they are doing. You are not interested in an
amateur, unless that
amateur wants a tutor. You are fussy and exacting
about having
your desires satisfied. You are willing to
experiment and try new
modes of statement. You bore easily and thus require
adventure and
change. Your commitments don't last very long & you
often tend to
stray. Loyalty! y is not one of
your strong points. You are more sensual than
sexual, but you
are
sometimes downright lustful.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: J?

You are blessed with a great deal of physical
energy. When used
for a good cause there is nothing to stop you,
except maybe that
they aren't always used for the good. ( you could
dance all
night.) You respond to the thrill
of the chase and the challenge of the mating game.
You can carry
on great romances in your head. At heart you are a
roamer and need
to set out on
your own every so often. You will carry on long-
distance
relationships
with ease. You are idealistic and need to believe in
love. You
have a need to be nurtured deep within.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: K?

You are secretive, self-contained, and shy. You are
very sexy,
sensual,
and passionate, but you do not let on to this. Only
in intimate! e
privacy will this part of your nature reveal itself.
When it gets
down to the
nitty-gritty, you are an expert. You know all the
little tricks of
the
trade, can play any role or any game, and take your
love life
very
seriously. You don't fool around. You have the
patience to wait
for the
right person to come along. You are very generous &
giving,
often
selfless. You are kind-natured & sweet, which is
found to be
attractive by many. You are a good friend.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: L?

You can be very romantic, attached to the glamour of
love. Having
a
partner is of paramount importance to you. You are
free in your
statement of love and are willing to take chances,
try new sexual
experiences and
partners, provided it's all in good taste. Brains
turn you on.
You must feel that your partner is intellectually
stimulating,
otherwise
you will find it difficult to sustain the
relationship. You re!
quire
loving, cuddling, wining, and dining to know that
you're being
appreciated.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: M?

You may appear innocent, unassuming and shy; but we
know that
appearances can lie. When it comes to sex, you are
no novice but
something of a
skilled technician. You can easily go to extremes,
though, running
the
gamut from insatiability to boredom with the whole
idea of love.
You can be highly critical of your mate, seeking
perfection in
both of
you. It is not easy to find someone who can meet
your standards.
You have difficulty expressing emotions and drawing
close to
lovers. You are often
selfish, thinking you are always right no matter
what. You never
give in. Winning is your prime desire- at any cost.
You often
forget friends and family and you live for the
moment.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: N?

You are emotional and! Intense. When involved in a
relationship,
you throw your entire being into it. Nothing stops
you; there are
no holds barred. You are all consuming and crave
someone who is
equally passionate and
intense. You believe in total freedom. You are
willing
to try anything and everything. Your supply of
energy is
inexhaustible.
You want to be pampered and know how to pamper your
mate. You also
enjoy
mothering your mate. You often have the greatest
love affairs all
by
yourself, in your head. You are very imaginative.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: O?

You are very interested in fun activities yet
secretive and shy
about your desires. You can re-channel much of your
energy into
making money and/or
seeking we. You can easily have extended periods of
celibacy. You
are a
passionate, compassionate lover, requiring the same
qualities from your mate. Love is serious business;
thus you
demand
intensity, diversity and is
willing to try anything or anyone. Sometime your
passions turn
to
possessiveness, which must be kept in check.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: P?

You are very conscious of social proprieties. You
wouldn't think
of doing anything that might harm your image or
reputation.
Appearances count. Therefore, you require a
good-looking partner.
You also require an intelligent partner. Oddly
enough, you may
view your partner as your
enemy...a good fight stimulates those vibes. You are
relatively
free of
hang-ups. You are willing to experiment and try new
ways of doing
things. You are very social and sensual; you enjoy
flirting and
need a good deal
of physical gratification.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: Q?

You require constant activity and stimulation. You
have
tremendous
physical energy. It is not easy for a partner to
keep up with you.
You are an enthusiastic lover and tend to be
attracted to poem!
ple because of their ethnic groups. You need
romance, hearts and
flowers, and
conversation to turn you on and keep you going.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: R?

You are a no-nonsense, action-oriented individual.
You need
someone who
can keep pace with you and who is your intellectual
equal-the
smarter the better. You are turned on more quickly
by a great mind
than by a great body. However, physical
attractiveness is not
very
important to you. You have to be proved to be worthy
for a
partner. You
have a need to prove yourself the best. You want
feedback on
your
performance. You are open, stimulating & romantic.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: S?

For you, it is pleasure before business. You can be
romantically
idealistic to a fault and is capable of much
sensuality. But you
never
loose control of your emotions. Once you make the
commitment you,
you stick like glue. You could get jealous and
possessive. You
tend to be very selfish often regarding yourself as
the only human
being on the planet. You like being
the center of attention. You are very caring,
sensitive, private
&
sometimes very passive. Turned on by soft lights,
romantic
thoughts. When it gets down to the nitty-gritty, you
are an
expert. You know all the little tricks of the trade,
can play any
role, or any game, and take your
love life very seriously. You don't fool around. You
have the
patience to wait for the right person to come along.
You are very
generous & giving, often selfless. You are kind
natured & sweet,
which is found to be attractive by many. You are a
good friend.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: T?

You are very sensitive, private & sometimes very
passive. You like
someone who takes the lead. Music, soft lights &
romantic thoughts
turn you on.
You fantasize & tend to fall in & out of love soon.
When in love
you are
romantic, idealistic, mushy & extremely. You enjoy
having your
senses &
your feelings stimulated, titillated & teased. You
are a great
flirt. You can make your relationships fit your
dreams, all in
your own head. Once you put your mind to something
you manage to
stand by it and see your dreams through. You aren't
very good at
expressing your feelings. You like
things your own way. You do not like change; you
like to hold on
to
things. This may not always be good because if given
an
opportunity things may develop into great things.
You work your
way to the top. Attention must be given to what
others say because
even though you don't want to
hear it their advice may turn out to save your life.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: U?

You are enthusiastic & at you're happiest when in
love. When not
in love
you're in love with love and always looking for
someone to adore.
You see romance as challenge. You are a roamer &
needs adventure,
excitement
freedom. You enjoy giving gifts & looking good. You
are willing to put others feelings above yours.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: V?

You are individualistic & you need freedom, space &
excitement.
You wait
till you know someone well before committing
yourself. Knowing
someone
means psyching her/him out. You feel a need to get
into his/her
head to
see hat makes him tick. You are attracted to
eccentric types. You
believe that age is no barrier. You are good at !
responding to
danger, fear & suspense.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: W?

You are very proud, determined & refuses to take no
for an answer
when it come to love. Your ego is at stake all the
time. You are
romantic,
idealistic, often in love with love itself, not
seeing your
partner for
who she or he really is. You feel deeply about love
& tends to
throw all
of your self into a relationship. Nothing is too
good for your
lover. You like laying love games.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: X?

You need constant stimulation because you get bored
quickly. You
can
handle more than 1 relationship at a time with ease.
You can't
shut off
your mind. You can do 2 things at once. You are very
talented.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: Y?

You are sensual & very independent. If you! u can't
have it your
way, you will forget the whole thing. You want to
control your
relationships, which
doesn't work out too well. You respond to physical
stimulation.
However if you can make money you will give up the
pleasures of
the flesh for the moment. You have a need to prove
yourself the
best. You want feedback on
your performance. You are open, stimulating &
romantic.

________________________________________________________

Does your name begin with: Z?

You are very romantic but show feels that to love
means to suffer.
You
wind up serving your mate & attracting people who
have unusual
trouble.
You see yourself as a lover's saviour.

############################################
2. By Month

JANUARY

*Ambitious and serious *Loves to teach and be taught
*Always
looking at
people's flaws and weaknesses *Likes to criticise
*Hardworking
and
productive *Smart, neat and organised *Sensitive and
has deep
thoughts
*Knows how to make others happy *Quiet unless
excited or tensed
*Rather
reserved *Highly attentive *Resistant to illnesses
but prone to
colds
*Romantic but has difficulties expressing love
*Loves children
*Homely
person *Loyal *Needs to improve social abilities
*Easily jealous

FEBRUARY

*Abstract thoughts *Loves reality and abstract
*Intelligent and
clever
*Changing personality *Temperamental *Quiet, shy and
humble *Low
self
esteem *Honest and loyal *Determined to reach goals
*Loves
freedom
*Rebellious when restricted *Loves aggressiveness
*Too sensitive
and
easily hurt *Showing anger easily *Dislike
unnecessary things
*Loves
making friends but rarely shows it *Daring and
stubborn
*Ambitious
*Realizing dreams and hopes *Sharp *Loves
entertainment and
leisure
*Romantic on the inside not outside *Superstitious
and ludicrous
*Spendthrift *Learns to show emotions

MARCH

*Attractive personality *Affectionate *Shy and
reserved
*Secretive
*Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic *Loves
peace and
serenity
*Sensitive to others *Loves to serve others *Not
easily angered
*Trustworthy *Appreciative and returns kindness
*Observant and
assess
others *Revengeful *Loves to dream and fantasize
*Loves travelling
*Loves attention *Hasty decisions in choosing
partners *Loves home
decors *Musically talented *Loves special things
*Moody

APRIL

*Active and dynamic *Decisive and haste but tends to
regret
*Attractive
and affectionate to oneself *Strong mentality *Loves
attention
*Diplomatic *Consoling *Friendly and solves people's
problems
*Brave and fearless
*Adventurous *Loving and caring *Suave and generous
*Emotional
*Revengeful *Aggressive *Hasty *Good memory *Moving
*Motivate
oneself and the others
*Sickness usually of the head and chest *Easily get
too jealous

MAY

*Stubborn and hard-hearted *Strong-willed and highly
motivated
*Sharp
thoughts *Easily angered *Attracts others and loves
attention
*Deep
feelings *Beautiful physically and mentally *Firm
standpoint
*Easily
influenced *Needs no motivation *Easily consoled
*Systematic (left
brain) *Loves to dream *Strong clairvoyance
*Understanding
*Sickness usually in
the ear and neck *Good imagination *Good debating
skills *Good
physical
*Weak breathing *Loves literature and the arts
*Loves travelling
*Dislike being at home *Restless *Hardworking *High
spirited
*Spendthrift

JUNE

*Thinks far with vision *Easily influenced by
kindness *Polite
and
soft-spoken *Having lots of ideas *Sensitive *Active
mind
*Hesitating
*Tends to delay *Choosy and always wants the best
*Temperamental
*Funny
and humorous *Loves to joke *Good debating skills
*Talkative
*Daydreamer
*Friendly *Knows how to make friends *Abiding *Able
to show
character
*Easily hurt *Prone to getting colds *Loves to dress
up *Easily
bored
*Fussy *Seldom show emotions *Takes time to recover
when hurt
*Brand
conscious *Executive *Stubborn *Those who loves me
are enemies
*Those who hates me are friends

JULY

*Fun to be with *Secretive *Difficult to fathom and
to be
understood
*Quiet unless excited or tensed *Takes pride in
oneself *Has
reputation
*Easily consoled *Honest *Concern about people's
feelings
*Tactful
*Friendly *Approachable *Very emotional
*Temperamental and
unpredictable
*Moody and easily hurt *Witty and sarky *Sentimental
*Not
revengeful
*Forgiving but never forgets *Dislike nonsensical
and unnecessary
things
*Guides others physically and mentally *Sensitive
and forms
impressions
carefully *Caring and loving *Treats others equally
*Strong sense
of
sympathy *Wary and sharp *Judge people through
observations
*Hardworking
*No difficulties in studying *Loves to be alone
*Always broods
about the
past and the old friends *Likes to be quiet *Homely
person *Waits
for
friends *Never looks for friends *Not aggressive
unless provoked
*Prone
to having stomach and dieting problems *Loves to be
loved *Easily
hurt but takes long to recover *Overly concerned
*Puts in effort
in work

AUGUST

*Loves to joke *Attractive *Suave and caring *Brave
and fearless
*Firm and has leadership qualities *Knows how to
console others
*Too generous and egoistic *Take high pride of
oneself *Thirsty
for praises *Extraordinary spirit *Easily angered
*Angry when
provoked *Easily jealous *Observant
*Careful and cautious *Thinks quickly *Independent
thoughts *Loves
to lead and to be led *Loves to dream *Talented in
the arts, music
and defence *Sensitive but not petty *Poor
resistance against
illnesses *Learns to
relax *Hasty and rushy *Romantic *Loving and caring
*Loves to make
friends

SEPTEMBER

*Suave and compromising *Careful, cautious and
organised *Likes to
point
out people's mistakes *Likes to criticize *Quiet but
able to talk
well
*Calm and cool *Kind and sympathetic *Concerned and
detailed
*Trustworthy, loyal and honest *Does work well
*Sensitive
*Thinking *Good memory *Clever
and knowledgeable *Loves to look for information
*Must control
oneself
when criticising *Able to motivate oneself
*Understanding
*Secretive
*Loves sports, leisure and travelling *Hardly shows
emotions
*Tends to
bottle up feelings *Choosy especially in
relationships *Loves wide
things *Systematic

OCTOBER

*Loves to chat *Loves those who loves him *Loves to
takes things
at the
centre *Attractive and suave *Inner and physical
beauty *Does not
lie or
pretend *Sympathetic *Treats friends importantly
*Always making
friends
*Easily hurt but recovers easily *Bad tempered
*Selfish *Seldom
helps
unless asked *Daydreamer *Very opinionated *Does not
care of what
others
think *Emotional *Decisive *Strong clairvoyance
*Loves to travel,
the arts and literature *Soft-spoken, loving and
caring *Romantic
*Touchy and easily jealous *Concerned *Loves
outdoors *Just and
fair *Spendthrift and
easily influenced *Easily lose confidence

NOVEMBER

*Has a lot of ideas *Difficult to fathom *Thinks
forward *Unique
and
brilliant *Extraordinary ideas *Sharp thinking *Fine
and strong
clairvoyance *Can become good doctors *Careful and
cautious
*Dynamic in
personality *Secretive *Inquisitive *Knows how to
dig secrets
*Always
thinking *Less talkative but amiable *Brave and
generous
*Patient
*Stubborn and hard-hearted *If there is a will,
there is a way
*Determined *Never give up *Hardly become angry
unless provoked
*Loves to be alone
*Thinks differently from others *Sharp-minded
*Motivates oneself
*Does not appreciate praises *High-spirited
*Well-built and tough
*Deep love and emotions *Romantic *Uncertain in
relationships
*Homely *Hardworking *High abilities *Trustworthy
*Honest and
keeps secrets *Not able to control emotions
*Unpredictable

DECEMBER

*Loyal and generous *Patriotic *Active in games and
interactions
*Impatient and hasty *Ambitious *Influential in
organisations *Fun
to be
with *Loves to socialise *Loves praises *Loves
attention *Loves to
be
loved *Honest and trustworthy *Not pretending *Short
tempered
*Changing
personality *Not egoistic *Takes high pride in
oneself *Hates
restrictions *Loves to joke *Good sense of humour
*Logical

########################################
3. By Date

If your birthday is on ..... Scroll down to find
out about your
nature

December 23rd - January 1st
Red

January 2nd - January 11th
Orange

January 12th - January 24th
Yellow

January 25th - February 3
Pink

February 4th - February 8th
Blue

February 9th - February 18th
Green

February 19th - February 28th
Brown

March 1st - Match 10th
Aqua

March 11 - March 20th
Lime

March 21 st
Black

March 22 nd - March 31st
Purple

April 1st - April 10th
Navy

April 11th - April 20th
Silver

April 21st - April 30th
White

May 2nd - May 14th
Blue

May 15th - May 24th
Gold

May 25th - June 3rd
Cream

June 4th - June13th
Gray

June 14 - June 23rd
Maroon

June 24th
Gray

June 25 - July 4th
Red

July 5th - July 14th
Orange

July 15th - July 25 th
Yellow

July 26th - August 4 th
Pink

August 5th - August 13th
Blue

August 14th - August 23rd
Green

August 24 - September 2nd
Brown

September 3rd - September12th
Aqua

September 13th - September 22nd
Lime

September 23rd
Olive

September 24th - October 3rd
Purple

October 4th - October 13th
Nave

October 14th - October 23rd
Silver

October 24 - November 11th
White

November 12th - November 21st
Gold

November 22nd - December1st
Cream

December 2nd - December11th
Gray

December 12th - December 21st
Maroon

December 22nd
Teal

RED

Cute and lovable type, you are picky but always in
love ...and
liked to be loved. Fresh and cheerful, but can be
"moody" at
times. Capable with
people, nice, soft, and that can love you for the
way you are.
Likes
people that are easy to talk to, and can make you
feel
comfortable.

CREAM

Competitive and sportive. Don't like losing and
always cheerful!
You are
trustworthy, and very out-going. You choose love
carefully, and
don't fall in love easily. But once you find the
right one, you
don't let go for a
long long time.

TEAL

You are mostly interested in your looks. And have
high standards
in
picking love. You think and make a solution
precisely, and hardly
make
stupid mistakes. You like to lead, and is easy for
you to make new
friends.

GREY

You are attractive, and active. You never hide your
feelings, and
express everything that's inside. But can be selfish
at times. You
want to be
noticed, and don't like to be treated unequally. You
can brighten
up
people's day. You know what to say at the right
time, and you have
a good sense of humour.

GREEN

You get along well with new people. You are not
really a shy
person, but
sometimes you can hurt people's feelings by your
words... You like
to be
loved and noticed by your lover, but mostly you are
single,
waiting for
the right person.

GOLD

You know what's right and what's wrong. You are
cheerful and out
going.
It's hard for you to find the one you want, but once
you find the
right
person, you won't be able to fall in love again for
a long time.

PINK

You are always trying your best in everything, and
like to help
and care
for other people. But you are not easily satisfied.
You have
negative
thoughts, and you look for romantic love like in a
fairytale.

YELLOW

You are sweet and innocent. Trusted by many people,
and have a
strong
leadership towards relationships. You make good
decision and make
the
right choice at the right time. And always dreaming
of romantic
relationship.

MAROON

You are intelligent, and know what's right. You like
to take
things go
your way, which can sometimes cause trouble or not
thinking about
other
people's feelings. But you are patient when it comes
to love...
Once you
get a hold of the right person, it's hard for you to
find a better
love.

ORANGE

You are responsible for your own actions, and you
know how to
treat
people. You always have goals to reach, and are
competitive. When
it comes to friendship, you find it hard to trust
someone, but
once you find the
right friend, you trust them for ever.

PURPLE

You are mysterious, never selfish and get interested
in things
easily.
Your day can be sad or happy depending on your mood.
You are
popular
between friends but you can act stupid at times, and
forget things
easily. You go for person that's trustworthy.

LIME

You are calm, but easily stressed out. You get
jealous easily,
and
complain over little things. You can't get stuck
into one thing,
but you
have a capable personality for everyone to trust you
and like
you.

SILVER

You are imaginative and shy, but you like trying new
things. You
like to
challenge yourself. You learn things easily, and
like "Hard to
get". Your love life is normally hard and confusing.

WHITE

You dream and have goals in your life. You get
jealous easily and
you
don't react to things easily. You are different and
sometimes
thought
highly by others.

OLIVE

You are warm and light hearted. You seem to flow
well with friends
and
family. You don't like violence and know what's
right. You are
kind and
cheerful, but don't envy other people easily.

BROWN

You are active and sportive. It's hard for other
people to become
close
with you, but you fall in love easily. But once you
find out you
can't get something, you give up and let go easily
as well.

BLUE

You have low self-esteem, and very picky. You are
artistic and
like to
fall in love, but you let your love pass by, by
loving with your
mind, not your heart.

NAVY

You are attractive, and love your life. You have a
strong feeling
towards everything. And very easily distracted. Once
you get angry
at someone, it's hard for you to forgive them.

AQUA

Your feelings change suddenly and easily. You are
always lonely,
and like travelling. You are truthful, but listen
and believe
other people too easily. It's hard to find love for
you, and you
get lost in love easily. Sometimes you get hurt by
love.

BLACK

You are challenging, and have the "guts". But you
don't like
changes in
your life. And once you make a decision, you keep it
that way for
a long
time. Your love life is also challenging, and
different.

ORANGE

You are responsible for your own actions, and you
know how to
treat
people. You always have goals to reach, and are
competitive. When
it comes to friendship, you find it hard to trust
someone, but
once you find the
right friend, you trust them for ever.

#########################################
4. By Signing Style

SINGLE UNDERLINE BELOW THE SIGN !!

These persons are very confident and are good
personalities. They
are a
little bit selfish but believe in "Happiness of
human life".

TWO DOTS BELOW THE SIGN !!

These persons are considered to be Romantic, can
easily change
their
fianc�es as if they change their clothes. They
prefer beauty in
other
persons & they themselves try to look beautiful.
They easily
attract others.

SINGLE DOT BELOW THE SIGN !!

These persons are more inclined towards classical
arts, simple &
are very cool. If you loose faith with them, then
these persons
will never look back at you. Hence its always better
to be careful
with these people.

NO UNDERLINES OR DOTS BELOW THE SIGN !!

These persons enjoy their life in their own way,
never pay
attention to
others views. These are considered to be good
natured but are
selfish too.

RANDOM SIGN, NO SIMILARITY BETWEEN NAME & SIGN !!

These persons try to be very smart, hide each &
every matter,
never say
anything in straight forward manner, never pay
attention to the
other
person of what he is talking of.

RANDOM SIGN, SIMILARITY BETWEEN NAME & SIGN !!

These persons are considered to be intelligent but
never think.
These
people change their ideas & views as fast as the
wind changes
its
direction of flow. They never think whether that
particular thing
is right or wrong. You can win them just by
flattering them.

SIGN IN PRINTED LETTERS !!

These persons are very kind to us, have a good
heart, selfless,
are ready to sacrifice their life for the sake of
their near &
dear. But these seems
to think a lot and may get angry very soon.

WRITING COMPLETE NAME AS THEIR SIGN !!

These persons are very kind hearted, can adjust
themselves to
any
environment & to the person they are talking. These
persons are
very firm on their views & posses a lot of will
power.

Mother

READ THIS WITH LOT OF PATIENCE.,

ONCE TWICE THRICE...........UNTIL U UNDERSTAND IT..

When you were 1 year old, she fed you and bathed you.
You thanked her by crying all night long.

When you were 2 years old, she taught you to walk.
You thanked her by running away when she called.

When you were 3 years old, she made all your meals with love.
You thanked her by tossing your plate on the floor.

When you were 4 years old, she gave you some crayons
You thanked her by coloring the dining room table.

When you were 5 years old, she dressed you for the holidays.
You thanked her by plopping into the nearest pile of mud

When you were 6 years old, she walked you to school.
You thanked her by screaming, "I'M NOT GOING!"

When you were 7 years old, she bought you a baseball.
You thanked her by throwing it through the next-door-neighbor's window.

When you were 8 years old, she handed you an ice cream.
You thanked her by dripping it all over your lap.

When you were 9 years old, she paid for piano lessons.
You thanked her by never even bothering to practice.

when you were 10 years old she drove you all day, from soccer to
gymnastics to one birthday party after another.
You thanked her by jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 years old, she took you and your friends to the movies.
You thanked her by asking to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 years old, she warned you not to watch certain TV shows.
You thanked her by waiting until she left the house.

When you were 13, she suggested a haircut that was becoming.
You thanked her by telling her she had no taste.

When you were 14, she paid for a month away at summer camp.
You thanked her by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15, she came home from work,looking for a hug.
You thanked her by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16, she taught you how to drive her car.
You thanked her by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17, she was expecting an important call.
You thanked her by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18, she cried at your high school graduation.
You thanked her by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19, she paid for your college tuition, drove you to
campus,carried your bags.
You thanked her by saying good-bye outside the dorm so you wouldn't be
embarrassed in front of your friends.

When you were 20, she asked whether you were seeing anyone.
You thanked her by saying, "It's none of your business

When you were 21, she suggested certain careers for your future.
You thanked her by saying, "I don't want to be like you

When you were 22, she hugged you at your college graduation.
You thanked her by asking whether she could pay for a trip to Europe.

When you were 23, she gave you furniture for your first apartment.
You thanked her by telling your friends it was ugly.

When you were 24, she met your fiancee and asked about your plans for
the future.
You thanked her by glaring and growling,"Muuhh-ther, please!"

When you were 25, she helped to pay for your wedding, and she cried and
told you how deeply she loved you.
You thanked her by moving halfway across the country.

When you were 30, she called with some advice on the baby.
You thanked her by telling her, "Things are different now."

When you were 40, she called to remind you of a relative's birthday.
You thanked her by saying you were "really busy right now.

When you were 50, she fell ill and needed you to take care of her.
You thanked her by reading about the burden parents become to their
children.

And then, one day, she quietly died.
And everything you never did came crashing down like thunder.

YOUR HEART.

IF SHE'S STILL AROUND, NEVER FORGET TO LOVE HER
MORE THAN EVER.. AND IF SHE'S NOT, REMEMBER HER UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AND
PASS IT ON...

Humanity

A few weeks ago NIMH (National Institute of Mentally Handicapped ,

Hyderabad, INDIA) had conducted a sports meet for all the Physically
& mentally handicapped children at National Stadium Hyderabad.In one
race.., Nine contestants, all physically or mentally disabled,They
assembled at the starting line for the 100-yard dash. At the gun,
they all started out, not exactly in a dash, but with a relish to
run the race to the finish and win. All, that is, except one little
boy who stumbled on the asphalt, tumbled over a couple of times,and
began to cry.

The other eight heard the boy cry. They slowed down and looked back.
Then they all turned around and went back......every one of them.
One girl with Down's Syndrome bent down and kissed him and
said, "This will make it better." Then all nine linked arms and
walked together to the finish line.

Everyone in the stadium stood, and the cheering went on for several
minutes.People who were there are still telling the story.

Why??

Because deep down we know this one thing: What matters in this life
is more than winning for ourselves. What matters in this life is
helping others win,even if it means slowing down and changing our
course.

If you pass this on, we may be able to change our hearts as well as
someone else's. "A candle loses nothing by lighting another
candle" " Please tell others about it - at least to the people who
will understand the meaning of the message.

Problem with Girls..girls* and guys please give ur comment

The problems with GIRLS:

;
If u TREAT her nicely, she says u are IN LOVE with
her;

If u Don't, she says u are PROUD.

If u DRESS Nicely, she says u are trying to LURE her;

If u Don't, she says u are from CHENNAI.

If u ARGUE with her, she says u are STUBBORN;

If u keep QUIET,! she says u have no BRAINS.

If u are SMARTER than her, she'll lose FACE;

If she's Smarter than u, she is GREAT.

If u don't Love her, she tries to POSSESS u;

If u Love her, she will try to LEAVE u.(very true
huh?)

If u tell her your PROBLEM, she says u are
TROUBLESOME;

If u don't, she says that u don't TRUST her.

If u SCOLD her, u are like a CHACHA to her;

If she SCOLDS u, it is because she CARES for u.

If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot be TRUSTED;

If she BREAKS hers, she is FORCED to do so.

If u SMOKE, u are BAD BOY;

If she SMOKES, she is a GENTLELADY.

If u do WELL in your exams, she says it's LUCK;

If she does WELL, it's BRAINS.

If u HURT her, u are CRUEL;

If she HURTS u, u are too SENSITIVE!!

& sooo hard to please!!!!!





If u send this to girls, they will swear that it's not
true.......

but if u don't, they say u are selfish.....

The moral of the story is.......SEND THIS TO GIRLS OUT
THERE ANYWAY...
Send
it to boys also, gives them some laughter ...

--------

Words to remember for a while



Boys are like apples on trees. The best ones are at
the top of the
tree.



The girls don't want to reach for the good ones
because they're afraid
of
falling and getting hurt. Instead they just get the
rotten apples that
are
on the ground, that aren't as good, but easy.



So the apples at the top think that there is something
wrong with them,
when
in reality, they are amazing.



That is why we just have to be a little patient and
the right girl, the
one
who takes a chance to find the good, right apple, will
come someday...



Send this to all the boys who you know are at the top
of the tree.



So Guys if u are alone...this means that u r on
top....so be confident
and
wait for ur time....

AUTHOR: UNKNOWN